So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
