was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
