just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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