when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
