Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
false alarm, still single
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
