And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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