Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
