"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
