it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
