Little spoons don't ask big questions
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
