dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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