I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
