Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
