Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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