we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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