Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
We're not piercing ourselves today.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
