careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Drunk is not a location!
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
