yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
false alarm, still single
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