MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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