god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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