I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
