I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
