We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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