Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
another moral hangover. fuck.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
