Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
he puts the penis in happiness.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize