My friends, they love my intelligence
wrigley field is MILF paradise
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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