even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
