But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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