i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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