my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
