Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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