sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Is it penis luge time yet?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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