i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Randomize
