I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
