Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
