Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I miss vodka workout Fridays
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
