Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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