I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
zippers are such a cool invention
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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