i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
