After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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