either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I'm at about main and main street
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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