She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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