And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
