two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
