i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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