I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
