I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
