Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I deserve this hangover.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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