She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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