Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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