Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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